I had plans for this weekend…..big plans. I wanted to camp and watch the stars as I fell asleep. I wanted to hike and kayak. However, I live in the Midwest…and the Midwest tells you what you are going to do.
It decided to be 105 (well with the heat index) and this girl is.like a fluffy marshmallow, and will melt. So, my date with a book and a hammock were cancelled. I was NOT happy.
So, I went to plan B….
I went kayaking (even though I had the wrong date and the wrong time 🥴 but thankfully I know the owner and she had mercy on me.😁
My husband and I have found the only way we relax….is to do something active. The big lake with the boats all around…the lapping of the water..:the wind blowing….and everything seems easier to understand. My brain loses the static. I have clear thoughts and a clear vision…noise is gone.
As I paddled, and the pain in my left shoulder began (I have no idea why) I started to think about life…and all the struggles we all deal with. As the pain in my shoulder increased (and I’ve been doing the rowing machine since January so there was no reason for this pain) I wanted to stop in the middle of the lake. I didn’t want to continue. However, I knew…the only way home was to keep going.
I know that is how I feel about life some times. We all do…we all have our burdens…and we just want to stop. I want my dad to be whole again…I don’t want to do through this disease with him called dementia.
I want to let the burdens of work, raising children, the burdens of all the hats I wear and things I juggle…but…
No matter the pain….if I don’t keep going…I won’t get home. For me, my home is not here…it can’t be found on this earth…but it’s where I’m headed when the pain of this life…is behind me.
There are better things that await me…
Keep going…you are not home yet.
The Reluctant Red Nose 