Today I headed to see my parents….my Dad has dementia and my Mother is starting to have some issues as well. We have tried to seek other care providers but my parents are stubborn and refuse to listen to reason.
Dad has been brought home by neighbors several times….found walking in the road barefoot.
Today his hallucinations were a lot and I am tired. I watched my daughter roll with the punches and we laughed together…because otherwise…you will cry. Today my Ellie was cutting cake for her grandfather…he asked her why she wasn’t cutting a piece for the other little kids (there were none). My daughter, without missing a beat….looked at her grandfather and said… “they can’t have any right now.” And he replied “oh, ok!” And that was it!
My reality is that I won’t have conversations with my Dad like I used to….I wish I would have known when that was….maybe I would have appreciated it more.
Today I told my Mom that I had had cancer and that’s why I haven’t been able to be around as much. It upset her….she wanted to make sure that I was ok…my Dad sat there listening….not absorbing any of what I said to him….and that’s ok.
I brought them a simple cd player with some Books on tape…hoping maybe that will be a good distraction.
I repeat myself
I speak at great volumes….I am literally shouting….
It is always meant with words being spun completely wrong
I am grateful for humor…laughter….helps the pain go down a bit easier.
I called my sister to vent….and cried a little…
And tomorrow…..we will pull ourselves back up…and keep going.
The Reluctant Red Nose 