Sometimes, there is truth and sometimes….that truth is hard to swallow.
I think there are times in life that we just need to take a backseat. Just need to sit by the water…and listen to the babbling brook, or the rush of the sea. We need to dive into different cultures. We need to read a book, a magazine….and forget that we own cell phones. We need to write or draw…make soap, or run…or do all of those things.
What makes life real and worth living…isn’t the amount of followers you have on all your social media….but that is something everyone that is reading this has heard before.
About three years ago, I had surgery for skin cancer. What was supposed to be just a tiny set back…became apparent as I lay on the surgery table…that what was supposed to be a quick little set back….would set me back for a week…and it did…and it was horrible…but what made it horrible…was that I wasn’t prepared for it. What was supposed to be just a quick procedure…became apparent that it was indeed a deeper incision than he thought it would be…but didn’t realize it until he was in there. I thought that that night I would be attending my son’s basketball game. Since I was just given a local, the doctor was able to tell me during surgery…that that indeed would NOT be what I would be doing….and I wouldn’t be doing much of anything for SEVERAL days. As I’m literally under the knife at this point…I’m getting a little annoyed. I don’t do well at surprises….and I’m not sure that there are too many that do.
Right now, I’m at the “resting” part….its been a long haul….and I’m ready to rest…recharge. The problem is….I’m really really horrible at it. I feel guilty for sitting…I feel guilty for doing things just for me…but there are times in life…that that is what must be.
I need to travel….get away from my comfort zone. I need to see how other people live…what foods they eat….what houses they live in….I need to explore. I need to be out of my comfort zone. I need to experience new things. When we experience new things we realize just how very small we are in this huge world…and sometimes that is just what we need. Sometimes, we get too big for our britches. Sometimes, we think the world revolves around us….sometimes…our kids take us for granted….our staff does, and our animals and children do….and sometimes…people have to learn to do things without us. Sometimes…we need to remember what makes us uniquely us….and that can’t be learned in the noise…the chatter…the constant movement.
This year….I don’t want to talk about what mean things people have done to me, what lies they’ve told…I just want….to stick my feet in spring water….hike and explore…forget to check my phone…and laugh….I want to really laugh. I want to get a sunburn so that all you see is my freckles again…I don’t want to spend another summer without swimming at all.
Sometimes, people read things that I write…and instead of reading the fact that I’m trying to push above all the lies and yuck…they say I’m bitter and angry…and if that is the case…then I’m a terrible writer…and shouldn’t be writing at all.
However, more people tell me that they are glad that I write what I write…and as long as I hear from those people….then I’m gonna keep writing.
I’ve decided this year that you can either take me or leave me. You can either be for me…or you can be against me. You can either say mean and cruel things about me and my husband….or you can speak truth.
I sat in my chair the other day…wondered why some people felt so strongly about me one way or the other…and I just felt that actually…I must be doing something right. If your not ever making waves….are you ever really living? If everyone likes you do you stand for everything? I don’t think you can stand for everything…you have to be against something.
So this year….I’m taking a backseat to all the drama….gonna enjoy the ride…the beauty of this crazy world…I’m gonna listen to nature…gonna take some amazing hikes….see the beauty of things that I’ve never seen before…and I will tell you all about my adventures as we go!
Happy New Year Everyone! It’s gonna be a good one!
The Reluctant Red Nose 